Friday, May 20, 2005
A Civi Guide to Military speak
you may not know it but we military folk have a special subtle way of talking.
We are, by law, not allowed to do a great many things.
BUT, you can get around it. Think of South park when the hunters say "its coming right for us" when hes hunting, you say one thing but are doing another.
Major Zimmer (no Im not making that up) comes up to me around 11:30 today and says
"Hey Jayson do you have anything to do today"
My response "yes, I have some admin"
His response "well you better go do that"
He and I both knew I had a stack of folders to process and file. Infact I had just handed him about a foot of papers stacked that was his area of expertise (CH 149- our NEW NEW (like two years old Search and Rescue Choppers), I had hours of work left to do. Some of it with him directly involved
When I handed him that stack he said "That looks like a great tuesday job". When he said Tuesday, this automatically means he has released me for the rest of the day.
Did he ask me what Admin I had to do?No
Does it take an entire afternoon to do Admin of any kind? Not usually.
Did I once say "hey can I have the afternoon off"? no
I have not once been told at my new place that I was released from duty, it's always implied. That way, if I get in trouble for leaving early, my Boss(s) can't be held responible. Its CYA (cover your ass) and the airforce excels at it.
Another little trick the airforce has is called "Min Manning". Meaning only esential personal need stick around. Essential usually means people will die if you are not doing your job (aka the SAR boys on 30 minute standby, if they arn't at work on time, people die). I'm a paper pusher, infact Im a paper pusher's lacky. There isn't anything that gets done, that I do, that's remotely "essential". Min manning is a General's code for "damn boys, it sure is a nice day for golf, I'm leaving, so you can to"
It is a nice day btw, and there were lots of white hairs out playing Golf when I left the office at 11:45.
On the other hand, I have never EVER left my "post" without consent. I can't just leave, I have to be told (in the ever so subtle way I get told to leave, one time Major Mike waved at me, it meant I could leave). that's why I wasn't home yesterday till after 4:30, we had stuff to do and it needed getting done that day.
So sometime you have 3 hour days and others you have 10 hour days (or 16 or 18 or 20, if things are bad enough) it all evens out at the end.
Another good line is "have you done your PT yet today?" - Orders say every CF member must exercise for an hour (includes travel and shower times) every day. If it just so happens that you "excerise" at 3:30 every day, well that's just a conincidence.
Its a good system, a fun system, it ususally means I have an easy time of it. they are teaching me more Staff work stuff, which is scary. The more Staff work you do, the better you are it, the more work they assign you. Sadly if you screw it up, especially if you do it on purpose, you get...reprimanded in rather unpleasent ways. Its amazing how much you can punish someone and still be well within the Geneva Convention.
Its the long weekend, but I will try to get on at Chapters if I can. The working out goes okay, even though I wake up So freaking sore in the morning. don't expect any dramatic changes when I get back, the first two weeks has mostly been getting back into excersing. The belly remains, for now! It's days, happily, are numbered!
We are, by law, not allowed to do a great many things.
BUT, you can get around it. Think of South park when the hunters say "its coming right for us" when hes hunting, you say one thing but are doing another.
Major Zimmer (no Im not making that up) comes up to me around 11:30 today and says
"Hey Jayson do you have anything to do today"
My response "yes, I have some admin"
His response "well you better go do that"
He and I both knew I had a stack of folders to process and file. Infact I had just handed him about a foot of papers stacked that was his area of expertise (CH 149- our NEW NEW (like two years old Search and Rescue Choppers), I had hours of work left to do. Some of it with him directly involved
When I handed him that stack he said "That looks like a great tuesday job". When he said Tuesday, this automatically means he has released me for the rest of the day.
Did he ask me what Admin I had to do?No
Does it take an entire afternoon to do Admin of any kind? Not usually.
Did I once say "hey can I have the afternoon off"? no
I have not once been told at my new place that I was released from duty, it's always implied. That way, if I get in trouble for leaving early, my Boss(s) can't be held responible. Its CYA (cover your ass) and the airforce excels at it.
Another little trick the airforce has is called "Min Manning". Meaning only esential personal need stick around. Essential usually means people will die if you are not doing your job (aka the SAR boys on 30 minute standby, if they arn't at work on time, people die). I'm a paper pusher, infact Im a paper pusher's lacky. There isn't anything that gets done, that I do, that's remotely "essential". Min manning is a General's code for "damn boys, it sure is a nice day for golf, I'm leaving, so you can to"
It is a nice day btw, and there were lots of white hairs out playing Golf when I left the office at 11:45.
On the other hand, I have never EVER left my "post" without consent. I can't just leave, I have to be told (in the ever so subtle way I get told to leave, one time Major Mike waved at me, it meant I could leave). that's why I wasn't home yesterday till after 4:30, we had stuff to do and it needed getting done that day.
So sometime you have 3 hour days and others you have 10 hour days (or 16 or 18 or 20, if things are bad enough) it all evens out at the end.
Another good line is "have you done your PT yet today?" - Orders say every CF member must exercise for an hour (includes travel and shower times) every day. If it just so happens that you "excerise" at 3:30 every day, well that's just a conincidence.
Its a good system, a fun system, it ususally means I have an easy time of it. they are teaching me more Staff work stuff, which is scary. The more Staff work you do, the better you are it, the more work they assign you. Sadly if you screw it up, especially if you do it on purpose, you get...reprimanded in rather unpleasent ways. Its amazing how much you can punish someone and still be well within the Geneva Convention.
Its the long weekend, but I will try to get on at Chapters if I can. The working out goes okay, even though I wake up So freaking sore in the morning. don't expect any dramatic changes when I get back, the first two weeks has mostly been getting back into excersing. The belly remains, for now! It's days, happily, are numbered!
# posted by Ty @ 12:42 PM 
Comments:
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Must be nice. In my world, the only way to get rid of people is to go to Alan and be like "Al, we need to cut so and so. I wanna have more tables." Or "Al, we need to cut so and so. It's dead and Cass and I can handle it." Getting yourself cut is much harder. You have to conspire with all the other servers, then have your closer go ask Alan to cut you. Very tricky, Al doesn't like to cut people.
Don't expect any drastic changes here - unless of course my parents try to kill me, in which case you'll be home for a funeral and a grad. I don't think they'd wanna kill Bren, I think their fury is more directed at me. I'm a little tanned I guess. That's a change.
Don't expect any drastic changes here - unless of course my parents try to kill me, in which case you'll be home for a funeral and a grad. I don't think they'd wanna kill Bren, I think their fury is more directed at me. I'm a little tanned I guess. That's a change.
I hear in hell you can get a good tan.
According to the Catholics out there, I will be getting a V. Good Tan indeed.
According to the Catholics out there, I will be getting a V. Good Tan indeed.
Ha, you're all so subtle in the military, I loves it. Very clever.
I don't know why you're so worried about your "belly". I mean, I think it's great that you're getting in good shape but honestly I think you were just fine when you left. I mean, I'm not going to complain if you come back later in the summer with bitchin abs or anything, but really... you're great the way you are.
As for me, there should be no drastic changes... I'm running and swimming but these things take time. I'll try and get a bit more sun so I'm not so freaking pale. I've been out a little, and the freckles are starting to come out on my shoulders, but I need a lot more sun for anything noticable to happen.
Kim, don't let your parents kill you... explain to them how much you've invested in your life what with your complete university degree. To kill you now would be like throwing that away. If all else fails, move to Mexico for six months till the heat dies down.
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I don't know why you're so worried about your "belly". I mean, I think it's great that you're getting in good shape but honestly I think you were just fine when you left. I mean, I'm not going to complain if you come back later in the summer with bitchin abs or anything, but really... you're great the way you are.
As for me, there should be no drastic changes... I'm running and swimming but these things take time. I'll try and get a bit more sun so I'm not so freaking pale. I've been out a little, and the freckles are starting to come out on my shoulders, but I need a lot more sun for anything noticable to happen.
Kim, don't let your parents kill you... explain to them how much you've invested in your life what with your complete university degree. To kill you now would be like throwing that away. If all else fails, move to Mexico for six months till the heat dies down.
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