Ty Ewup

that's right ladies and gentlemen, I am back in the City. not for 13 days though, a long time, more like 13 months, october 06.

I got posted back, I didn't tell anyone except for my dad. I'm hanging out at my parents place for now, but I am looking for an apartment closish to whyte ave, I will be working downtown at Canada Place 97th st and Jasper, yay me.

Also have to be close to the action, which makes a university area plae essential and since I'm looking a full month a head of all the pep squeek firsties, I should have pick of the litter :)

I'm on the market (for a place to live), so call me up: 780-903-7433!!

My phone deleted all your numbers, so you HAVE to call me, or else I can't get a hold of you.

And yes, I know, I'm a bastard for not telling anyone. I'm at the U of A right now, my login and password still work, SWEET.

ta-ta

The song is stuck in my head, but its almost revelent to today's discussion.
I want to talk about the difference between girls and boys. On OJT right now is one girl, she's all of 5'2" and surrounded by boys all the time.

I'm starting to think its wearing on her. She made a list of observations of things that are different between her and us (those of us who are male).

Item 1: Its totally okay for a girl to get upset after eating a lovely dinner, spending time with valued friends, seeing 4 of them off for places abroad, but you happened to notice the waitresses are "more attractive than I am". Apparently this ruined her entire night, and felt bad the next day. What? She maintains other girls feel the same way. I have no idea, but I figure theres always going to be people way more attactive than I am (aka Brad Pitt), shouldn't we all have had time to come to grips with that?

Item 2: This one really confused me, I tried to figure out why she was upset, but I doubt she even understood.
Her Premise 1: My entire life sucks
Premise 2: I've done nothing with my life except complete three years of an chem engineering degree
Premise 3: All my friends are having the time of their lives and I will never ever be happy like they are.

I swear to god this is how she explained it to me. The problem was, she met up with some of her friends and found out some of them are getting married. I asked if that was what was bothering her. She said no!
"they're all getting married, they're going to have kids, my life sucks" (again, this is a DIRECT quote)
I asked again "Does being engaged make you a better person? Make you happy? your raison d'etre?". Agian she answered no!
So apparently she feels no need to get married, but because all her other friends are getting married, her life is crap. W-T-F.

Baffled, I moved on.

Item 3: This continues off the "I've done nothing with my life" tangent. This stems from yet another conversation with her friends. Apparently one of her friends moved to two places for missionary work and can now speak thia(? thailand speak). Missionary work, I suppose, is a highly glamourous life, because WOW was she ever upset she hadn't flown to the ends of the earth preaching gosspel. I asked her if she didn't like her job, she said she loved her job. I asked if she didn't like RMC, she said she LOVED RMC, and gave me a shopping list of activities she VOLUNTEERED for (no one volunteers in this man's army, its just not right). Apparently though, because she couldn't do both Military, get married, and do missionary work, and look like an earl's waitress, shes depressed.

But wait there's more,

Do you know what sparked this all off? A game of cards.
A game of cards She suggested, infact insisted on playing. Its called "dominos" or sometimes "the 7 game". She ended up losing and after she lost she loudly proclaims:

"When it rains it pours, when one part of your life sucks, it all sucks"

Nothing had changed from yesterday, or last week, or even last year! However, she is now in the mind set that her life is spiraling towards an abyss of medicority. All this speaks of maddness.

She later went on to explain that boys are callous and unfeeling towards basic human emotion.

Mostly, I'm just baffled.

Authors Note: I obviously don't think all girls are like this, but the girl in question prefaced her entire tirade with "wow there really is a difference between girls and boys". I'm starting to think she wanted a pity party, and was annoyed we wouldn't play along.

Its Sunday, and its raining. Not a little rain mind, but enough to have made the parking lot a pool. with 100km/h gusting winds, there are branchs everywhere. Funny thing is, its still 30 degrees outside, even with all this rain. Now its wet and even more humid, why people live in this city boogles my mind.

Only in Winnipeg can you have a drought and a flood in the same year.

People continue to leave. 4 of my fellow officers are now off to parts unknown. They will be missed, considering they had the two cars we always used. Now I will have to walk to work, and take the bus around the city. Highly inconvienent. I will miss them too, good people is just about the only thing keeping me sane around here. Well that and the superdose of Xanax! Just kiding, I would never take Xanax, but my invisible friend sure does!

The Officer Mess closed down for the summer and now we eat in the all ranks mess. When you go to the washroom the NCMs (Non Coms) have riddled the walls with sayings such as "officers suck" or "don't step on an officers ego while hes counting his money" or "Lcol so and so needs a in the ass". Needless to say, I was shocked. I suppose I just don't see the world like the ncms do, because most officers I know are good people. I suppose I would be bitter too if I saw someone getting paid more than myself for seemingly less work. No matter, our ncms are professionals and they get the job done. They just may swear at my under their breathe the entire time. If that helps them sleep at night, so be it.

The backspace and delete do not work on this computer, so I will cut this blog short. Everyone have a wonderful day and I will see you all soon.

This has me thinking. Which is better, a work related or a work out related booty. I could use a machine that gets to the "gluts" (aka, the bum) and makes them like steal. What if you already have a nice shaped posterior, would working it out change its shape or solidify it?

Regardless, I am not in Shape YET, I have the tools to get there. I have begun to think of myself as a "work-in-progress" and feel completely at piece with that. As long as I worked out the day before, I can walk (or stumble if the work out was particularily brutual) with my head held high. I started thinking about my long term work out goals. When is "big" too big? I won't have to worry about this for atleast 6 months, but I feel I can mull it over during this lengthy period. Right now, if I lift more weights than last week, I won't change in shape/mass either in fat or muscle. eventually though, say when I'm benching 70lbs an arm, getting bigger can be a real problem. I've mostly decided that once I get to a predetermined weight (as yet undetrimined), I will stop and just increase the number of sets/reps (5 set instead of 3, 15 reps instead of 10, et cetera) and just increase endurance. Why? well what I've noticed is that big weightliftning guys can't work an 8 hour day. Their massiveness is only good for say, an hour or perhaps two. Where a wirey little guy can carry almost as much and for 12 hours. Again, this is all long term goals. I havn't yet been focusing on my abs, as the upper body work out needs unfailed abs for a few of the excerises. When I into a groove with Mark's 4 days regime, I will no doubt start beating my tummy into shape. If anything, not hitting the abs is motivation. I see that, despite my wishs, I have yet to achieve a 6 pack, so I go to the gym, regardless of how tired I am. So like Arnie once said " I will kill you last" (this ofcourse is subject to change)

About me moving back to edmonton. I'm sure I could just as easily be doing nothing there as I am here. I could very readily sit upon my chair and sigh in either Winnipeg or Edmonton (almost interchangably). I put in my request, so never fear.

I feel like a beatnik a little, what with taking the year off. I will muck about, doing nothing except spend tax payers money, and take up space. Most of you have regular jobs, with mean bosses. The closest thing to a mean boss I've ever had in the military was a Captian who was crazy. He wasn't really mean, just gave really weird orders; "write me an essay on Canadian involvement in Vietnam". Random things like this. I never get leered at, well not overtly or to my knowledge, and flirting with the customers will never get me an increase in pay.

So, for all intents and purposes I am offically a god damned hippie. I just need my tie-dyed shirt and a really cool headband. Talk about how I was at the original woodstock, regardless of how impossible it is. I will enjoy it. You can refer to me as GDH as much as you like, as long as you call Mike Jorge.

There was a SERE course that was out in the field during the skeeter boom, they look like they have an all over rash. Suddenly I'm glad I havn't taken it yet.

I will see you all soon, so don't fret.

I want you all to think of Austin powers. The old lady who leads "the militant wing of of the salvation army", you know how she screams really loudly in a somewhat humourous manner?

Okay good, now in that voice I want you to say "RELEASE THE DRAGOON FLIES!"

They are everywhere, and they are getting DRUNK off skeeters. Skeeters levels jumped up 5 fold (they were already annoying before, now they are reported to bodily carry off small children) so instead of fogging, what does the City of Winnipeg do?

Release Dragon flies, and man are they everywhere. Only problem is, they can't stop eating, and are being found on the side walk, legs up, bellies distended, too damn fat to fly anymore. But atleast you don't lose a pint of blood walking from the mess to the barracks. It is funny to watch an overloaded dragon fly try to maintain flight, like they hit the insect rum a little too hard the night before.

Its a balmy 40ish with humidity, so that's always fun. Wearing a uniform in this weather is like having your own personal sauna, yay. Thankfully the office I work in has generals, that means the A/C works (or atleast most of the time), so we have but to be out outside for maybe 12 minutes a day. My room, on the third floor, has a ceiling fan, which helps to move the hot air around, very effective. I'm slowly getting used to the heat, and anything less than 35 out and Im usually okay. You start saying to yourself "its only 35 degrees out" and others will comment "its only 930 in the morning!" Why in the hell would anyone want to live here, seriously.

Everyone is leaving on TD, the people upstairs feel bad we all sit around and do nothing do they are sending a bunch of people east to ontario to watch russians (No, I'm not kidding, two Officer Cadets were tasked to watch Russians in North Bay, I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried) or fix phone lines in B.C. I will not be recieving TD, but I make lots more money than they do. It all balances out. Thankfully I will be home soon, and all this maddness will be over.

I've been hitting the gym, and its starting to hit back. Mark, a gym rat, showed me how to do leg exercises in such a way two days later, you can't walk. Its funny, like I'm that cockroach guy in MIB and I am just learning how to use my new skin. Mark tells me it will hurt less when I do the exercises again, he also says I have to push myself to get stronger. I think Mark is a liar, but hes huge, so I must believe him.

I've taken up swimming again, and I've decided to try for my NLS, starting with redoing my Bronze Cross, not a re-cert mind you, just redoing the course after nearly a decade of forgetting First Aid. It will be good, I will enjoy it. Two days ago, I mixed up the public swim times with the lane swim times and had to thread my way through small 6 and 7 year old kids as I did my laps. eventually there were no more kids on the big side of the pool, or so I thought. I switched to back stroke, no longer having to worry about hitting the 300 lbs...um..."female" and losing myself forever in her rotundnesss "shakes visably". Turns out though, a small 4 year old, wearing a PFD, was in the deep end on the edge. I came down, full force, on his head with my arm. I would feel bad, but what the hell is a 4 year old doing in the deep end without direct supervision. Kid wasn't hurt, and didn't even cry, I assume it wasn't the first time.

I saw my first cracker cats game, we lost, 12-8, there isn't one black person on the crack-cat team, so I guess we can keep the name (oh goody).

I started watching 24, and am currently eating it up with a spoon, its the new CSI in my life. Well, a good substitute atleast, we all know CSI can not be beat by ANYONE.

Good news all round.
A) It isn't raining, though much of manitoba remains underwater
B) I found my licence, thus making purchasing AND driving said civic infinately easier.
C) Erin is coming to visit, and I get to watch a horse show. You might recall I ly fear riding horses, WATCHING horses is fine though. I anticipate much double plus good fun to come from the "heart of the continent horse show". I'm sure if I bring Erin on base she will attract a lot of attention, which will promote the city of winnipeg.

Its too bad my other friends, all of whom are attractive, from Edmonton arn't visiting me, or else everyone would want to live in Edmonton. With such a gathering they would be all be requesting transfers to the beauty laden land of the west. Sadly only one is coming, sniff sniff

My group of keen officer cadets have, with the aid of recently graduated Mechanical Engineer, constructed a four-man beer funnel. That's right, this is your tax dollars at work, producing methods with which to consume alcohol faster. You should write a thank-you letter to your ridings' MP.

Since I'm in such a good mood, I am going to run a bit and try and hurt my body, I like to reward myself.

Take Care.

I'm at the community centre and it has more nanny guards than the MFRC, so I don't know how many blogs I will be able to read today.

Mark, the guy with the car, flew in late today and felt bad so stayed later. Its not that he did anything useful, he just stayed later. I am baffled by the RMC need to keep things in "balance" like we do anything important that it couldnt be started and finished tomorrow, within 10 minutes.

My Canada day weekend wasn't so bad. I went on a few rides and actually got a little green. Ofcourse this was after an entire day of riding these things, but I still got a little green. I blame the 18 mini doughnuts, they did me in, I refuse to believe I have less Amusement park ride stamina than I use to. Hand me my cane would you?

So my leave is all offical now, and I get 9 more days ON TOP of what I get in August. That means I'll be able to have a nice long visit in December after finals (maybe show up the day of a certain someone's last final, tee hee) and also still have enough time to come visit for Reading week (maybe, depending on how many "free" leave days the commander gives us plebs in december).

My transfer wouldn't likely go through till January, I suspect, as I still have to do pilot type "mini"-courses here in Winnipeg. Since I don't have to do anything, offically, with flying in OVER a year, they arn't moving very quickly getting me on said courses.

Its annoying, but atleast they give me leave whenever I ask for it. Also I we get this thing called "LTA" which makes it cheaper to go home once a year, so I could also use that for christmas, ontop of the Canada air military discount.

So Theres already been one birthday party thingy, and a proposed 2nd. I am fully willing to entertain any proposal to party. I plan on making the end of summer one of GRANDE proportions. There may even be party hats and streamers.

I will be purchasing my Car in Edmonton, but I have to find my Drivers Licence here, or get a new one. I'm not sure how I lost it, but I did. I may have mentioned this before, but I have been looking and it has not surfaced. I even cleaned my room from top to bottom looking for the dumb thing. I'll go check with the people here in manitoba and see what my options are. Till then I live with my Military ID, which is just as good. (P.s Civic Sedan won out, though I havn't decided on which package to go with yet, Im sure carly will be more than happy to oblige me and rattle off the discriminating details)

I will probably drive home on the 5th of Septmeber, so the 4th will be my last day. A Sit down dinner is no good, so maybe something akin to a picnic/sport day like you enjoyed last weekend could be had?

I know some of you are OLs for the Ickle-Firsties (was it really 4 years ago that I was one of those useless occupies of V-wing space?) so I'll try not to keep you out too late. I will have to drive, early, the next day so the festivities will have to be accordingly moderate.

till next time.